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- Bianca Gruenewald, RD
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Spoon-feeding…it sounds simple enough, right? Well, the truth is, there’s actually a right and a wrong way to spoon-feed.
Have you ever seen a baby getting spoon-fed on television or in movies? It usually goes something like…“Here comes the choo choo train!” or “Open up for the airplane! VROOOMMM!”.
Games like this that involve distracting your baby from the food that’s about to go into their mouth may seem fun and harmless, but they’re actually not helpful for a baby who’s still learning how to eat. Therefore, there are a few things to keep in mind when spoon-feeding to make sure that the process stays baby-led.
Enter – responsive spoon-feeding.
We’re going to teach you step-by-step how to spoon-feed your baby in a responsive way that respects your baby’s internal cues, helps them develop their oral motor skills, and encourages them to self-feed sooner rather than later (which is the ultimate goal!).
If you prefer to listen while you multitask – download our podcast episode below to hear all the details!
Ready to know how to safely and gradually progress your baby from purees to finger foods without fear?
Join our free workshop to learn more and receive our Texture Timeline™ starter guide as a free bonus!
Table of Contents
What is responsive feeding?
Simply put, responsive feeding is a method that allows your baby to be actively involved in the feeding process by letting them take the lead while you follow their cues.
You (the caregiver) are responsible for providing safe, nutritious, and developmentally appropriate food in a comfortable environment and on a consistent schedule. Your baby is in charge of the rest!
It’s your job to listen to, respect, and respond to your baby’s cues in a prompt, emotionally supportive, and developmentally appropriate way (1).
A big part of responsive feeding involves recognizing your baby’s hunger and fullness cues. Regardless of whether you feel like your baby hasn’t eaten enough or has already eaten a lot, it’s important to trust that your baby knows their body best and follow what their cues are telling you.
If this sounds a bit scary to you, you’re not alone! It might be comforting to know that babies are really good at recognizing and honoring their hunger and fullness cues (2). The truth is, babies know better than any of us how much food they need.
You’ve likely fed on demand up to this point anyway – the principles are the same – no need to stop now!
Letting them practice respecting their own cues from a young age is an important part of learning how to regulate their intake long-term (3). In fact, caregivers stepping in and restricting food or pressuring little ones to eat can lead to them consuming more or less than they need (1).
Ultimately, responsive feeding can help little ones get the nutrition they need to grow and thrive. It can also improve their relationship with food and teach them how to self-regulate their intake (eat when hungry and stop when full) well into their childhood years and beyond (1,4,5).
What cues should parents be responding to?
Every baby is different so cues can vary depending on your little one’s unique personality (6). In general, there are some common things to look out for when it comes to recognizing your baby’s cues. Let’s review them!
Hunger cues
Signs that your baby is hungry and would like to continue eating include (7):
- Opening their mouth wide
- Leaning in toward food
- Following food with their eyes
- Excitedly waving arms or kicking legs
- Smacking or licking lips
- Suckling
- Putting their hand to their mouth
Fullness cues
Signs that your baby is full and has had enough food include (7):
- Stops opening their mouth for the spoon
- Spitting out food
- Getting distracted
- Turning away from you or the food
- Shaking their head “No”
- Getting agitated or fussy
- Whining
Cues that your baby wants to self-feed
There will come a time when your little one will start to show signs of wanting to feed themselves. This is a good thing!
It’s important to know what these cues look like so that you can take these moments as an opportunity to let your baby try flying solo!
Signs your baby may want to try feeding themselves more independently include:
- Reaching or grabbing for the spoon
- Putting their hand on top of yours
- Reaching for food directly from their bowl or plate
Responsive spoon-feeding process
The principles of responsive feeding should also apply when you’re the one feeding your baby.
You might be thinking to yourself, “How can I let my baby be in charge of the feeding process when I’m the one holding the spoon?”. Don’t worry, it is still possible – let’s go over step-by-step how to spoon-feed your baby in a responsive way.
Step 1
Make sure that your baby is seated comfortably in their chair in an environment that is free of distractions. Then, sit down next to your baby so that you’re at eye level with them at an angle where they can see you.
Step 2
Preload a baby-safe spoon with a small amount of puree, then bring the spoon a few inches away from your baby’s mouth.
Step 3
Once your baby sees the spoon in front of them, wait for them to lean forward towards the spoon, open their mouth, and wrap their lips around the spoon.
Step 4
Once the spoon is in your baby’s mouth, wait for your baby to make the first move! Keep the spoon still and hold it horizontally with your baby’s lips wrapped around it. Wait for your baby to initiate the motion of removing the food from the spoon.
Step 5
Once they’ve removed the food, pull the spoon out of their mouth while keeping it in the same horizontal position.
Common spoon-feeding mistakes to avoid
Force-feeding
While some babies are eager to dive into eating from a spoon right away, others may be a bit more hesitant…this is normal! Going from only getting milk to all of a sudden getting solids can be a huge adjustment – but with time, consistent exposure, and practice, your baby will come around.
In the meantime, we understand that it can be super stressful to feel like your baby isn’t eating enough. But we NEVER recommend force-feeding your baby.
Force-feeding can create a negative association around food, not to mention disregard your little one’s hunger and fullness cues (which we really want to be looking out for and responding to!).
Tricking or distracting your baby
While it may seem innocent, distracting your baby into looking away and then putting the spoon in their mouth when they’re not expecting it is very dangerous and can increase the risk of choking. Similar to force-feeding, it can also create a negative association around food.
This is why we always recommend waiting for your baby to initiate putting food into their mouth so that they’re physically and mentally ready for it, and are able to swallow it safely (8).
Swiping upwards with the spoon
A common practice for many parents is to swipe the spoon upwards and outwards toward the roof of their baby’s mouth to help remove the puree from the spoon.
Believe it or not, this is actually a form of force-feeding!
It goes against the responsive feeding principle of letting your baby take the lead. Remember, you want your baby to be the one to initiate removing the puree from the spoon. This will help them to develop and practice those oral motor skills!
It can also increase the chance that they will gag or choke.
Think about it this way…if your baby has already removed the amount of food that they can handle from the spoon, and then you force the rest of the food into their mouth on top of that, you’re giving them more than they can handle at once and they aren’t even expecting it. This can lead to the food slipping to the back of their mouth, initiating a gag, or potentially moving past the gag reflex, resulting in choking.
Wiping baby’s mouth with the spoon
Okay, spoon-feeding can be SUPER messy! We completely understand wanting to clean up the mess as you go to stop things from getting too out of control. It’s one of the benefits of starting solids this way, right?
Not exactly.
We recommend that you avoid the temptation to use the spoon to wipe extra puree off of your baby’s face.
Let the process be messy!
Allowing your baby to feel the texture of different foods on their skin can be really helpful sensory exposure. This kind of exposure can help to prepare them for the experience of eating different foods and food textures as they move through their feeding journey.
Try to embrace the glorious mess of your little one learning how to eat…this phase of eating won’t last forever!
Overloading the spoon
It can be tempting to load up a spoon with as much puree as possible so that your baby gets a big bang for their bite. However, overloading the spoon can be overwhelming for your baby!
It’s better to start small and only load a little bit of puree onto the spoon at a time so that your baby can take a bite that will be more manageable in their little mouth.
Feeding too quickly
Something that we see often is parents spoon-feeding their baby too quickly. We get it, it’s easy to get caught up in the excitement of feeding your baby solid foods – but – it’s important to keep the process baby-led and go at your baby’s pace!
It’s ok to reload the spoon with puree as quickly as you’d like, but when it comes to the speed of actually taking bites of puree, that should be left up to your little one.
Letting your baby eat at their own pace can help make sure that they get the chance to practice manipulating the food in their mouth and give them the time they need to swallow it safely.
Learn more about factors that may influence the length of meals and approximately how long meals should last. In general, we recommend to slow it down, let your baby take the lead, and enjoy this one-on-one quality time!
Not letting your baby self-feed
It’s important to pay attention to your baby’s cues and give them the chance to try feeding themselves when they show signs of being ready.
We know that this is easier said than done and that it can come along with some worry that your little one may not be able to feed themselves enough food. The truth is, it’s completely normal for your baby’s intake to decrease a little bit while they work on mastering this brand-new skill!
Practice really does make progress. It’s important to resist the urge to step in to help and instead let your baby get the practice and experience they need.
Plus, they’re still getting the nutrition they need from breast milk or formula at this point, so intake isn’t something to be concerned about while they practice eating.
Staying stuck on spoon-feeding baby for too long
Hopefully, it’s clear now that we believe spoon-feeding can be a great first step to introduce solids and is not harmful when done properly in a responsive way.
That said, spoon-feeding for too long does have a negative impact.
Since spoon-feeding is mostly used for purees, the problem with getting stuck on spoon-feeding is that it usually means that the introduction of more challenging textures and finger foods is delayed.
Research shows that delaying the introduction of lumpy food textures past 9 months of age is associated with higher reported picky eating tendencies later in childhood (9).
The World Health Organization (WHO) recommends that babies gradually progress from easier to more challenging textures and that they be served foods from family meals by the time they’re 12 months of age (10).
While we agree that this should absolutely be happening by 12 months, it’s important to start this progression well before that to give your baby time to learn how to like and accept these foods.
We recommend introducing your little one to a wide variety of foods and food textures by 9 months at the latest.
This is because there’s a sensitive period between 6-9 months where babies have an affinity for learning how to eat and for learning to accept new foods (11).
Giving babies the opportunity to practice with more challenging textures by 9 months allows them to develop their skills. This means they will be seasoned pros by the time they reach 12 months and are relying on food as their main source of nutrition.
We completely support your decision to start your baby’s feeding journey with purees and spoon-feeding, but we recommend using purees as a stepping stone to progress to more challenging food textures.
Here’s a summary of the dos and don’ts we just covered for responsive spoon feeding. Click on the image to download it or pin it to Pinterest for later.
Best foods for responsive spoon-feeding
While you can start with completely smooth purees (phase 0 on the Texture Timeline™), the best purees for responsive spoon feeding are slightly thicker ones. We want them to be able to stick to the spoon a little bit so they won’t drip off immediately if your baby bumps the spoon with their mouth or hands.
Some examples of thicker, lumpier purees include:
- Hummus (phase 1)
- Full-fat Greek yogurt (phase 1)
- Liver pâté (phase 1)
- Boiled egg yolk, mashed (phase 1)
- Tuna salad (phase 2)
- Oatmeal made with quick oats or rolled oats (phase 2)
- Mashed beans (phase 2)
- Loose ground beef mixed into marinara sauce (phase 2)
Best spoons for responsive spoon-feeding
When it comes to choosing a spoon for your little one, there are tons of options out there! We’re going to break down a few different kinds for you, and recommend our favorite ones for each stage in your responsive spoon-feeding journey!
Spoons for when you feed baby
When first starting out with responsive spoon feeding, we recommend choosing a spoon made from a soft, baby-safe material such as BPA-free silicone. Silicone is preferred over a typical metal spoon at this age because, well…accidental bumps against their teeth or your baby’s lip happen, especially once your baby starts grabbing for the spoon!
We recommend choosing a spoon with a longer handle while you’re the one spoon-feeding your little one. The shorter-handled spoons will come into play once your baby starts learning to feed themselves!
These long-handled bamboo and silicone spoons from Avanchy are a great option for spoon-feeding your baby!
Num Num Gootensil
This is our favorite “pre-spoon” – basically a spoon used to bridge the gap between your baby being spoon-fed and them being able to scoop things with a spoon independently.
The grooves help to hold puree on the spoon so that not too much drips off while your little one learns how to scoop up food and bring it to their mouth. All they have to do is dip the spoon into a puree and it will stick to the grooves so they can then bring it to their mouth without spilling.
This is so helpful because it can take babies a while to get the hang of the scooping motion needed to get food on a spoon. And then it’s a whole other skill to keep the spoon level enough that they don’t dump the pureed food between the bowl and their mouth.
Spoons for self-feeding
Congratulations, your little one is ready to take the next step in their self-feeding journey!
Spoons made from soft, BPA-free silicone are still the best option for this stage. But, at this point, you’ll want to look for a spoon that has a short, stubby handle that’s easy for your baby to grab onto.
A great example of this is the Bumkins Chewtensil.
Its rounded handle allows baby to grab onto it using their full fist (palmar grasp) which is great for little ones who haven’t quite developed the fine motor skills to pick up smaller objects yet!
Baby led weaning vs. spoon-feeding
It’s hard to talk about spoon-feeding without talking about the other popular option for starting solids…baby led weaning (BLW).
Despite what you might have heard, baby led weaning is not automatically the best option for starting solids! It may not be appropriate for every baby, or every family’s comfort level (12). Which, you probably already know since you’re here reading about how to spoon-feed your baby!
So why is everyone and their mother raving about BLW (ie. allowing baby to self-feed using whole foods from day one)?
Well, BLW has been gaining popularity because of the way it allows babies to respond to their hunger and fullness cues while letting them be an active participant in the feeding process (13).
BLW is also praised for how it naturally encourages the division of responsibility and principles of responsive feeding. But as you now know, spoon-feeding can be done in a responsive way too!
The truth is…both BLW and spoon-feeding purees can be done a right way and a wrong way. What it really comes down to is HOW feeding is done.
Let us explain.
A study was done to look at the development of picky eating between babies who were fed using BLW versus traditional spoon-feeding. This study showed that after responsive feeding practices were accounted for, there was no longer a significant difference in the development of picky eating between the two groups (14).
The takeaway? Responsive feeding plays an important role in reducing the incidence of picky eating tendencies down the road, and both spoon-feeding and BLW can be done in a responsive way (14).
Why is spoon-feeding important for babies?
As we’ve mentioned, starting with spoon-feeding purees is completely okay. In fact, purees are a convenient way to get your baby to consume iron-rich foods when first starting solids (a nutrient that babies need a lot of!) (15).
Aside from convenient nutrition, the ability to eat from a spoon is an important skill for babies (and one they’ll have to learn eventually whether starting with purees or BLW).
Learning to eat from a spoon encourages the development of oral motor skills like the ability to wrap their lips around a spoon, suck food off a spoon, and use their tongue to push puree back into their mouth (16).
When to stop spoon-feeding
How do you know when to stop spoon-feeding your little one? Well, the beauty of responsive spoon-feeding is that it allows you to pay attention and respond to the signs that your baby may be ready to start feeding themselves!
As soon as your little one is showing you signs that they want to start self-feeding (we went over these above), we recommend encouraging it!
Remember that even though starting out by spoon-feeding your baby is totally okay, the goal is for your baby to learn how to feed themselves independently as soon as possible!
How to encourage self-feeding
Every baby is different and it’s completely normal for them to learn new skills and hit milestones at different times (17).
That being said, if your baby seems to be sitting back and enjoying being spoon-fed with no signs of wanting to self-feed, there are a few things you can do to help encourage them.
Zero pressure is the name of the game! The goal is to help your little one become curious about using a spoon so that they can start to practice spoon-feeding on their own. Our top tips to encourage self-feeding using a spoon include…
- Modeling: Eating with a spoon in front of your baby to help encourage them to try it themselves (babies love to copy us!).
- Pre-loading the spoon: Taking care of the first step by scooping food onto the spoon for your baby, then handing them the pre-loaded spoon.
- Hand-over-hand method: Gently placing your hand over your baby’s hand to guide them through the motion of scooping food onto a spoon and guiding it towards their mouth. Be careful not to be forceful with this one – keep it gentle and playful!
Read more about these tips in our blog on teaching babies to use utensils.
When should babies be able to spoon-feed themselves?
It’s one thing for your baby to be interested in self-feeding from a spoon and start to practice…but mastering the skill of eating from a spoon independently (with more food ending up in their mouth than on the floor) is another!
Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) states that you can expect your baby to be able to eat from a spoon independently by 10-12 months of age. This is when fine motor skills needed to pick up and control objects like spoons start to develop (18, 19).
Pre-spoons with a shorter handle like the Num Num Gootensil don’t require as much coordination or balance, which means that your baby can hold onto the spoon with a palmar grasp. We’ve seen babies start to self-feed with a pre-spoon as early as 6 months!
When to seek help
If your baby doesn’t seem interested in trying to spoon-feed on their own or isn’t getting the hang of it even after a couple of months of consistent practice, it may be worth seeking additional guidance from a registered dietitian and/or speech-language pathologist.
Are you interested in learning about how to safely and gradually progress your baby from spoon-feeding and purees to finger foods?
Join our free workshop to learn more about our step-by-step method and receive our Texture Timeline™ starter guide as a free bonus!
Pin & save these tips for how to spoon-feed baby!
References
- Black, M. M., & Aboud, F. E. (2011). Responsive feeding is embedded in a theoretical framework of responsive parenting. The Journal of nutrition, 141(3), 490–494. https://doi.org/10.3945/jn.110.129973
- Ramsay, S. A., Branen, L. J., Fletcher, J., Price, E., Johnson, S. L., & Sigman-Grant, M. (2010). “Are you done?” Child care providers’ verbal communication at mealtimes that reinforce or hinder children’s internal cues of hunger and satiation. Journal of nutrition education and behavior, 42(4), 265–270. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jneb.2009.07.002
- Kral, T. V., Stunkard, A. J., Berkowitz, R. I., Stallings, V. A., Brown, D. D., & Faith, M. S. (2007). Daily food intake in relation to dietary energy density in the free-living environment: a prospective analysis of children born at different risk of obesity. The American journal of clinical nutrition, 86(1), 41–47. https://doi.org/10.1093/ajcn/86.1.41
- Perez-Escamilla, R., Segura-Pérez, S., & Lott, M. (2017). Feeding guidelines for infants and young toddlers: a responsive parenting approach. Nutrition Today, 52(5), 223-231.
- DiSantis, K. I., Hodges, E. A., Johnson, S. L., & Fisher, J. O. (2011). The role of responsive feeding in overweight during infancy and toddlerhood: a systematic review. International journal of obesity (2005), 35(4), 480–492. https://doi.org/10.1038/ijo.2011.3
- McNally, J., Hugh-Jones, S., Caton, S., Vereijken, C., Weenen, H., & Hetherington, M. (2016). Communicating hunger and satiation in the first 2 years of life: a systematic review. Maternal & child nutrition, 12(2), 205–228. https://doi.org/10.1111/mcn.12230
- Hodges, E. A., Johnson, S. L., Hughes, S. O., Hopkinson, J. M., Butte, N. F., & Fisher, J. O. (2013). Development of the responsiveness to child feeding cues scale. Appetite, 65, 210–219. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.appet.2013.02.010
- Fangupo, L. J., Heath, A. M., Williams, S. M., Erickson Williams, L. W., Morison, B. J., Fleming, E. A., Taylor, B. J., Wheeler, B. J., & Taylor, R. W. (2016). A Baby-Led Approach to Eating Solids and Risk of Choking. Pediatrics, 138(4), e20160772. https://doi.org/10.1542/peds.2016-0772
- Coulthard, H., Harris, G., & Emmett, P. (2009). Delayed introduction of lumpy foods to children during the complementary feeding period affects child’s food acceptance and feeding at 7 years of age. Maternal & child nutrition, 5(1), 75–85. https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1740-8709.2008.00153.x
- World Health Organization. (2016). Complementary feeding. Retrieved from: http://www.who.int/nutrition/topics/complementary_feeding/en/
- Harris, G., & Mason, S. (2017). Are There Sensitive Periods for Food Acceptance in Infancy?. Current nutrition reports, 6(2), 190–196. https://doi.org/10.1007/s13668-017-0203-0
- Cameron, S. L., Heath, A. L., & Taylor, R. W. (2012). How feasible is Baby-led Weaning as an approach to infant feeding? A review of the evidence. Nutrients, 4(11), 1575–1609. https://doi.org/10.3390/nu4111575
- Rapley, G., & Murkett, T. (2019). Baby-led weaning: Helping your baby to love good food. Vermilion.
- Brown, A., & Lee, M. D. (2015). Early influences on child satiety-responsiveness: the role of weaning style. Pediatric obesity, 10(1), 57–66. https://doi.org/10.1111/j.2047-6310.2013.00207.x
- Cichero, J. A. (2016). Introducing solid foods using baby‐led weaning vs. spoon‐feeding: A focus on oral development, nutrient intake and quality of research to bring balance to the debate. Nutrition Bulletin, 41(1), 72–77. https://doi.org/10.1111/nbu.12191
- van den Engel-Hoek, L., van Hulst, K. C., van Gerven, M. H., van Haaften, L., & de Groot, S. A. (2014). Development of oral motor behavior related to the skill assisted spoon feeding. Infant behavior & development, 37(2), 187–191. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.infbeh.2014.01.008
- Delaney, A. L., & Arvedson, J. C. (2008). Development of swallowing and feeding: prenatal through first year of life. Developmental disabilities research reviews, 14(2), 105–117. https://doi.org/10.1002/ddrr.16
- Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC). (2021). Fingers, Spoons, Forks, and Cups. https://www.cdc.gov/nutrition/infantandtoddlernutrition/mealtime/fingers-spoons-forks-cups.html
- Gerber, R. J., Wilks, T., & Erdie-Lalena, C. (2010). Developmental milestones: motor development. Pediatrics in review, 31(7), 267–277. https://doi.org/10.1542/pir.31-7-267
Bianca Gruenewald, RD
Bianca is a Registered Dietitian and works in a client support role at My Little Eater Inc. She's a dog-mom to Coco, and a proud auntie to her three year old niece and four year old nephew!
Bianca Gruenewald, RD
Bianca is a Registered Dietitian and works in a client support role at My Little Eater Inc. She's a dog-mom to Coco, and a proud auntie to her three year old niece and four year old nephew!
